This is Dedicated to the One I Love

Twenty-one years and one day ago on the most beautiful and magical Spring-like August day, I got to be Cinderella for the day and marry my Prince Charming.  I will never forget this day as long as I live.  From the hand-picked flowers in my bouquet, to riding off in a convertible to our reception, it was the most beautiful and picturesque of days.  The loveliest of lovely.

While this day may have felt like a fairy tale, the reality of marriage is anything but.  Sometimes I think we can get caught up in Facebook and Instagram fairytale-land that paints a picture of perfection and all things beautiful.  Newsflash:  Marriage isn't always lovely and starry-eyed.  In fact, many a day can go by where it's just NOT EVEN CLOSE.

Being married is actually hard work, with lots of sweat and tears.  But at the end of a hard day's work, there's the moment of sitting back and enjoying.  There's the feeling of satisfaction over what you've created or built.  You're invested because you've put in the time and sweat equity.   

Our former pastor once said of marriage: "It's a slow death."  Isn't that the truth?  If we want to have a great marriage, we have to be willing to give up our own agenda and wants.  We have to learn to compromise and do what's best for the team.  We have to learn to die to self and sometimes that process feels like two steps forward and three steps back. 

I'm so thankful to still be standing strong beside the man I married twenty-one years and one day ago.  But it's by grace alone.  Each and every day.  Sheer and utter grace.  Left to myself, that 'strong' in the sentence above becomes shaky at best.  God's grace infuses me with the power and ability to stand strong and hang on when I don't feel like it or don't have it in me.    

And maybe right about now I need to explain why I didn't post this yesterday on our Anniversary.  Because we were in a big fat fight and I didn't have anything nice to say, that's why.

So our 21st Anniversary might not have been our finest hour...

But today was 21 years and one day.  And between 21 years and one day, a lot happened.  I'm no longer shooting daggers at him and he's no longer giving me the silent treatment.  Yesterday was a hard work day, but today we're sitting back enjoying.  And maybe, just maybe, an Anniversary post the day after is a little more representative of marriage between two imperfect, messy people.  And maybe it's a great reminder that marriage is not about the wedding day or any one day in particular, but about a culmination of many.

21 years and one day.  For better or for worse.  And one day.  For richer or for poorer.  And one day.  In sickness and in health.  And one day.  Until death do us part.

And that right there is marriage, ya'll.