I Want These So Badly!

I wanted to tell you about these amazing placemats and the giveaway they are doing!  To enter, all you have to do is go to the blog Dreaming Big Dreams at http://dreamingbigdreams.net/2013/12/02/table-top-truths-christmas-giveaway/.

I love creative things like this that help us teach our kids God's Word.  I love the conversations it will bring to the dinner table.

I wanted to let you in on this awesomeness too.

If you enter the giveaway, good luck!  But I still hope I win!  :)

A Season of Letting Go

Picture the type-A personality and then picture it on steroids.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet my oldest child.  

Self-motivated?  You got it.  Driven?  To a fault.  Goal-Oriented?  Yep.  Large and In Charge?  Just a little.

While we like to poke fun with him, Joshua was made in God's image with these exact characteristics.  Eric and I know God made Joshua this way for a reason and that He wants to use these traits for His glory.  Yet sometimes driven personalities can become so focused and driven that they bull-doze right through God's plan.  Sometimes they can make their plan more important than God's plan.  

And therein lies the struggle.  Whether we are Type-A's or not, we can all relate, can we not?

Anyone who knows Joshua knows he is a runner.  And if you don't know him, about 5.2 seconds upon meeting him, you're gonna know he runs.  He lives it.  He breathes it.  He loves it.    

It's truly a strength and a weakness all rolled up in one.

It's a strength because God gave him the ability to run for a reason and He wants him to use it for Him.

It's a weakness because he would tell you his struggle lies in making this gift more important than the Giver.

And truly that's been the struggle.  He has spent the past couple of years in a battle--the battle of making running too important.  Anything we make too important in our life--even if it's a great thing--takes over the spot that God is supposed to have in our life.  The Bible calls it idolatry.

And, oh, how I can relate to my son's struggle!  I do the same thing--not with running (unfortunately, haha) but other things in my life.  I wonder if this IS the greatest struggle us western Christians face, having been blessed and given SO MUCH at our fingertips?  The struggle of making the stuff and the comfortable life more important than the relationship with the One who created us?  

But back to the story.  We watched and coached from the sidelines all last year as he  wrestled between flesh and Spirit.  Striving, exerting, fighting…  We watched him make mistakes, learning hard lessons from overtraining and over-doing.

This year, he finally decided to listen to his parents :) and try a different approach.  To back off, to not over-analyze, over-think, or over-do.  However, as the cross country season got under way, he was more than a little disappointed when times came in not where he wanted them.  Meet after meet, his performance was not where it had been the year before.  The temptation was to train more and push more.  To try harder.  

Strangely, in most circumstances, this is exactly what you want your athletes to do--train more, push more, try harder.  Yet, we knew Joshua's problem wasn't a lack of work ethic.  His problem was in letting go.

Eric and I are way more concerned about our children's hearts than we are about their sport's performance.  I daily pray for our children to love THE LORD, not anything else, with ALL their hearts, minds, soul and strength.  As I mentioned before, each one of us--we have the continually struggle, the constant battle, of other things in our lives usurping God.   However, at the same time, God uses all the activities we are involved in to shape our hearts, does He not?  He want us to talk to Him about ALL things.  Even concerns about races and times.  As a mom, I often try to figure out what God is trying to teach my children.  As I watched his performance suffer, I pondered and prayed about what was happening.  Lord, what are you doing?   Is this just a momentary setback?  Or are you doing something bigger here--is this your way of moving him away from running and pointing his life in a completely different direction?  Is running just too distracting in his pursuit of you?  

God seemed to be silent in answer to all of my questions, except for a faint, quiet, 'Wait.  No worries.  I've got this.'

The worry part.  Oh, I understood that part clearly.  You see, just as Joshua can be consumed with his worries with his running, I can be consumed with my worries regarding our children.  Oh, how I can fret and worry with the best of them.  Worry and fear can have me crawled up in a corner, sucking my thumb in no time.  God and I--well, let's just say we have an ongoing conversation about my issue on a very regular basis!  Let's just say He's still hammering it out.  

Isn't it amazing and so God-like that the Multi-tasker can work, mold and chisel two different people on the opposite side of the same problem?  

The wait part.  The waiting room I am also all too familiar with.  The waiting room, God's classroom for teaching faith and trust.  I knew from experience that I better sit back and get comfortable because the bell wasn't going to ring anytime soon.

'Wait.  No worries.  I've got this.'

In the wait, we kept encouraging him in the one thing we knew was God's best for Joshua.  Let go.  Let go of the temptation to let this sport consume.  Let go of his worries, his doubts, and his inadequacies.  Yes, he needed to train and do what his coach said.  But then he needed to just let go and be.

Amidst those hard days of defeat and frustration.  Those days that seemed like setbacks...

Bigger life lessons were at stake, the kind that teach us that our abilities don't define us, but God defines our abilities.  He makes the calls and He determines outcomes.  We don't and we can't.  

And we must trust and rest in that.

And little by little, as the season rolled along, the white-knuckle grip began to not cling so tightly.  This one-track, focused mind looked up and began noticing the scenery around him.

As he let go he began enjoying those God has placed around him. 

He stopped that bulldozer and became more reckless and carefree. 

Embracing the many different moments outside of running.

The night before Regionals I actually had to tell Joshua he better go to bed and get some sleep (where's the boy who's in bed by 8:30 the night before a race?).  

Before the boys ran, he joked around and cheered on the girls with his team (where's the boy that doesn't appear until moments before the start?). 

However, the pre-Regional haircut was still a serious matter.  Some habits die hard :).

As the Regional race got off, I noticed something different about Josh that day.  He seemed more confident and sure than I had seen him all year.  As if a weight had been lifted.

He ran well the entire race, placing eighth individually, resulting in a qualification for state.  He was so pumped.  We all were! (Not only were we excited about Josh, Sophie and her team also qualified for state!  But that is deserving of a post all its own)

The next week was full of anticipation, as well as exciting memorable things such as a good luck yard sign:

and a school-wide pep rally for the volleyball and cross country state qualifiers:

Friday was here before we knew it and away we drove once more down that long stretch of Western Kentucky Parkway to the eastern side of the state where all big sporting events are held.  

That evening, once again, I had to make Joshua go to bed at a reasonable hour the night before the meet.

As the hours ticked by before his race on Saturday, Josh was about as relaxed as I've ever seen him, joking and chumming about.  We saw and hung out with his old Louisville coach.

Then, finally, the event that he had had his eye on all season was upon us.  He warmed up at the start line as hundreds of spectators lined the course in anticipation, there to watch the boys 3A cross country race, the biggest and most competitive race of the day.  

All of the West Kentucky boys of Region 1 who had qualified individually were in the first lane.  As they bowed and prayed together, we were praying too:

 

The last time he had toed this line hadn't ended very well.  His buddy Zach knew this better than anyone and having him there for  mental support meant the world to all of us.

Joshua was ranked going into this race in the mid-60's.  I think because he wasn't ranked in the top ten or twenty, I was less nervous than I've ever been before he runs.  I set back and relaxed, thinking in my head that he would probably finish around 60th or so--a good and respectable finish.  And that would be that.

Wow, was I ever wrong!  And surprised.  So pleasantly surprised!  Isn't it the best feeling in the world to be pleasantly surprised??!

He is on the very right hand end

They took off and a few minutes into the race we were able to see them.  Joshua was pretty easy to spot and I kept having to do a double take, thinking is that really him???

He was in the front of the race (like top 35 or 40) the entire race and kept steadily passing people.  He looked so strong, I probably said a thousand times, 'Wow, I can't believe it!  He's doing so good!  Wow!'

Loose and carefree, relaxed and letting go...

He looked light on his feet and burden-less

He finished 36th with a time of 17:07 and was the first freshman to cross the line!

A pat on his back from his coach and his buddy Zach…the role models God has put in his life who he looks up to so very much.

Sometimes we can't grasp the whole story until the end.  We can't see the slow moving growth, the beauty emerging from the bulbs when we're standing right in the thick of the garden.  It's only weeks later when we are looking from afar that we see the whole picture--the transformation in entirety.

And that's exactly how I felt on this Saturday of the high school state cross country meet.  I stood from afar and was finally able to see all of those weeks leading up to this day.  Like one giant puzzle whose pieces began to fall into place.  Piece by piece he had let go, piece by piece he had gained freedom.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.  Galatians 5:1

A season of letting go and stepping off the bulldozer to smell the roses God has put along the path…and learning to enjoy every minute of it. 

'Be strong in the Lord and

never give up hope.

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got his hand on you so 

don't live life in fear

forgive and forget

but don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say'  

Small Town Poets

My Middle-Middle's Push to the Top

Sometimes middles can get lost in the shuffle.  Especially the middle child (child #3) in a family of five.    He's not only the middle child, he's the middle-middle child.  Sandwiched between two other middles, Wes has the hard pick of the lot in our family.  Yet maybe that is what makes a middle-middle child so special--the fact that they've got the hard pick of the lot.  They're not catered to, they're not given extra attention, they're often over-looked, and they're used to figuring things out for themselves.  Yet these hardships quite often end up being blessings.  Such is the case, I believe, for our Wes.  

He's used to hand me downs.  He's used to being told no.  He's used to waiting in line.  He's used to things not always going as planned.  Our Wes is easy-going and even-kill.  He's low maintenance and unassuming.

Quiet and thoughtful, he purposefully gets the job done without needing a lot of supervision.  Because he's our middle and that's what middles do.  Especially middle-middles.

I especially love the fact that God gave our middle-middle certain features that would naturally make him stand out among the rest of our children.  He's the only one with wavy blond hair.  He's the only one with blue eyes.  He's the only one with lighter skin.  Our older two look quite a bit alike, our younger two could pass as twins, but Wes--Wes' features are his and his alone.  Just one of God's creative ways of singling out our middle-middle. 

When our family first got into cross-country, the spotlight was naturally on our oldest two.  Wes got to run just because we were already there doing it, so why not let him jump in and do it too?  But we never really expected it to be his thing. 

Yet I'll never forget that day--that day that Wes came out of no-where in a race and surprised us all, charging ahead and throwing off that middle-middle status, making a name for himself in his unassuming, quiet way.  I watched on the sidelines, incredulous and dumb-founded, thinking, 'did Wes really just do that?'  And before we knew it, it was know longer just Josh and Sophie's sport, it was also Wes' sport.  

That was the day we set up and took notice, realizing he had a gift--a gift of running.  The day that we noticed he looked a lot like our family's favorite marathon runner: 

The day I put my mama foot down and said, 'YOU MAY NEVER CUT YOUR HAIR.'  :)

Anyhow, year after year, he ran.  Year after year, he improved.  We marveled at our middle-middle's noiseless tenacity and his no-fuss race approach.  Thoughtless, he just went out there and ran.  He set out to do his thing and got it done.  End of story.  And he had a lot of fun along the way.

Last year when we moved from Louisville to Paducah, I didn't realize how difficult the move was for Wes.  Of course I didn't.  He's our middle-middle.  Middle-middles don't complain.  Not only that, with newness comes excitement, so our first couple of months of running with a new team and going to public school was just one big wave of excitement.  There was no time to think. 

Occasionally, though, Wes would comment, 'I really miss running with our team in Louisville'.  At the time, I didn't have enough foresight to read between the lines of that statement.

This year, as cross country kicked off, Wes seemed to drag his feet.  For the first time in his life, he seemed disinterested in practicing.  It wasn't long before we realized that he had lost the spring in his step, the spark in his eye, the zeal.  He said to me countless times, 'I'm just not really enjoying running this year.'  

It's hard to sit by and watch your child waste what they've been given, waste what their good at.  Harder still to watch them not enjoy it.  It seemed he was at a crossroads--maybe God had other plans for his life and those plans didn't include running?  Maybe he was using this to show us that?  Maybe so?  Maybe not?  So many questions ran through my head.

While we have no idea what God has planned for our middle-middle, God does.  While we don't always know what's best for our children, God does.  He tells us in James 1:5, 'If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.'  We can come to him with any issue, any problem--big or small--and ask Him to give us wisdom.  As a parent, I find this Bible verse to be one of the most encouraging of all!  Parenting wisdom--oh, I need a large dose of that on a regular basis.  Hook up the IV, please!

The wonderful thing about God is that He created us for relationship.  He longs for an intimate relationship that involves talking to Him.  He wants us to come to Him and ask Him to solve what we can't.  

So I took this to Him, asking Him to bring back the glean to Wes' eye, the zeal.  To bring about an excitement that he used to have for running.  To give us the wisdom to know what he needed.

First, God faithfully brought about conversations with Wes that made us realized that he was missing the buddies he used to run with in Louisville.  He was missing the competition they had brought, as well as the camaraderie.  We realized that Wes thrives on that competitiveness.  He needed a challenge.  Without it, running was boring.

God brought to mind a similar situation that a good friend of mine had went through the season before.  I remembered she had began praying that God would bring another girl to their cross country team that would challenge her daughter.  He had answered that prayer and now her daughter and the new girl on their team were two of the top runners in the state.  

So, I started praying.  Praying that God would bring a teammate into his life that would stir up his passion for running again.  That He'd bring someone into Wes' life that would bring back that competitive glean.

God is so faithful.  He may not always work the way we expect or want, but if we invite Him to come into the smallest of details in our lives, He always shows up.  Always.

One thing God did was bring several strong middle school boys to the team.  In every single race, those boys improved.  By A LOT.  The middle school boys also won several meets as a team.  I think God is just getting started with this group and I look forward to seeing these boys continue to improve more and more in the years to come!

God also answered my prayer in a totally unexpected way--through someone not even on our team.

In the fourth race of the season, Wes ran against another sixth grader a few counties over from us.  His name was Jonah.  Wes had beaten Jonah last year, but this year this boy came out fast and furious.  He beat Wes by a good twenty seconds. 

And it wasn't long before that glean started coming back.  

Wes began looking for upcoming future races he had against Jonah.  He began trying harder in practices.  He began thinking about racing against Jonah at the cross country state meet.  He began setting his mind upon beating him--because that's what boys love to do--beat each other.

The competition was back.  And Wes was back.

As the end of the season drew near, I watched him get stronger and stronger.  And before we knew it, it was time for state.

The cross country state 'Meet of Champions' began like every other one I can ever remember--cold, windy and cold.  It's always ran at Masterson Station Park in Lexington, KY.  The course, a large open field of rolling hills, tends to invite and trap the blistery wind.  

We had gotten up at 5:00 AM that morning and began the long four hour trek across the state to Lexington.  Joshua had been involved in Homecoming the night before, so we had had to wait and leave for the meet the morning of.  Because of this, we couldn't get Jeremiah to the meet in time to run in his age group.  He really wanted to run anyway, so we put him in the 5th and 6th grade race with Wes.

It seemed like in no time, the fifth and sixth grade boys were lining up on the start line.

You can see Wes and Jeremiah left of center in this picture, wearing black with white stripes down the side of their shorts, Wes' blonde hair blowing in the wind.

There were almost 400 boys in this race--the picture above only shows about 1/3 of the start line.

The boys run straight out and up a hill.  Because of the number of kids in this race, it's important that you get out fast.  As a spectator, you only see them for a brief moment, as they run over the hill and out of sight.  And then you wait for them to come back in view….to see who has claimed the lead.  Waiting as a parent during a cross country race can be some of the longest minutes to endure.

They finally came into view and I quickly spotted Wes' hair!  Jonah was in first with Wes just a few steps behind him in second.  And then there was no one for several seconds.  It looked like the battle was going to be between Jonah and Wes, the West KY boys!  I wish I had a picture but I was just too in the moment to take any! All I remember about that moment is how red Wes' face was--I had never seen it that red in my life and prayed he was doing okay.

My other mama-friend and I took off running to the next spot where we would be able to see them again.  This is fairly close to the finish.  It's a good spot to stand cause you can see them for quite awhile running on the course.  

Soon, they came into view and Jonah had about an 8-10 second lead over Wes.  As we watched them run, for a moment it looked as if Wes might be gaining some ground…but Jonah continued to stay strong.  Here they are approaching us, Jonah with a pretty secure first place:

Wes coming by, face as red as can be:

Jonah finished the 3K in 10:37; Wes finished in 10:47.  Jonah broke the prior year record.  Wes came within a few seconds of doing so.

I was so, so, so happy for these two!

A little bit later, Jeremiah came through the finish:

He finished 123rd, with a time of 13:08!  So proud of this little guy too!  Proud that he never once complained about having to compete against a bunch of older boys.

When you finish in the top 10, you get to be presented your medals in a special ceremony.  Here they are below:  

There are some great runners in this crew--Jacob Sutherland for one.   And the little dude that got fifth is only a fourth grader (that's crazy!)!

It was a special day to go down in the memory book for our family.  A special day for our 'middle-middle' to shine.  I love more than anything in the world to watch my kids compete at a sport that they love.  And sharing that moment with friends and family--well, there's just nothing quite like it! 

These two have struck up a friendship that I'm so grateful for.  The friendship that I'll always remember as the one that brought the glean back to my son's eyes.  I'm looking forward to watching these two West KY runners push one another over the years to come.  

So proud of my 'Middle-Middle'!

  

On the Road Again!

As of last night, it's official!  I am off and running--no pun intended--for the Huntville, Alabama 'Rocket City Marathon'.  Saturday, December 14, 2013.  Yeah, I know.  Right in the middle of the crazy, holiday season.  Yet, let's just run down the list of why I can't not do this:

1. Because I'm crazy.  No, let me restate that.  When I don't run, I'm crazy.  100% bonafide nutso.  
2. I don't have time for it.  Yet, how can I not make time for it???  If running keeps me sane and stable, then it's a must-do.  And I'm never going to have time for it.  So I might as well just trudge ahead and, as Nike would say, 'Just Do It'. 
3. My whole world functions better when I have well-defined goals.  The times in the past when I've been on a training schedule for a race, it seems like the rest of my life stays focused.  Yet, when I'm out there running with no purpose, my life seems to go in that direction too.  I don't know why this is so, it just is.
4. My favorite time of the year to train for a race is the fall.
5. Huntsville is flat and fast.  Perfect for trying to --no, I can't even speak it out loud.
6. It's December 14, right after Thanksgiving and right before Christmas...that time of the year when I'm usually on an eating marathon.  Thought it might be a good idea to replace it with this :)
7. When someone in our family trains for something big, it brings us together in a fun way.  Weird, I know. 
8. Some of my sweetest times with God is when I run.  I can't wait to spend more time with Him.
9. I feel a little less than par these days at 43.  Decided it's time to kick my age in the butt and defy all kinds of odds.
10. I've just got this weird itching to do one, that's all.

Looking forward to what God wants to teach me through the treacherous, long runs ahead.  As I pound the pavement, I'm sure He'll pound and form my heart in new ways.  He'll shape through the hurt...you know that good-kind-of-satisfying-hurt.

So, it's official.  Wish me luck!  And pray for my not so young body--especially the knees.  and feet.

P.S.  Did I mention that I'm also doing one so that I can get Eric to buy me a new pair of running shoes?

See You at the Pole at MCHS: A Beautiful Sight!

This morning was 'See You at the Pole', the day thousands of students across the country meet around their school's flagpole.  Students gathered together to pray, read Scripture and sing.

But let me back up for a moment.

In our county, we have a new consolidated high school--a coming together of three smaller high schools to form one large one.  This is its first year.  It has been in existence for approximately six weeks now.  At first, there was much controversial and resistance to the idea of these three schools coming together.  Let's face it, we people like our comfort and don't really like change.  We don't like it when someone comes along and wants to shake our world upside down.

And so before the first day of school, there was lots of talk.  Talk that there would probably be lots of fights.  Talk that the students wouldn't mesh well together.  Talk that the sports teams wouldn't get along.  Lots of naysaying, which is normal and expected when a huge change is about to take place. 

So the first day of school arrived.  A day including a pep assembly, a slide show and a principal pumping up his students by busting out some dance moves.  Mustang t-shirts were given to each and every student.  Students left on day one with a sense of belonging and ownership...a new community was being built.  


The first football game was so well attended that it was standing room only.  People had to park off campus and be bussed in from remote locations.  Students filled and overflowed the student section, painted up with crimson and black.  A new community was forming, meshing together and meshing together well.  

While I'm sure there were some issues and problems here and there, all in all things were running smoothly.  There was an overriding spirit of positivity and excitement.  

These were the things we saw from the outside.  

What we didn't see on the outside was a stirring and a gathering of students coming together in prayer on the inside of those walls.  From the beginning...from the first day that those double doors opened to a flood of students, a group of heads were bent, flooding the throne room with requests.  

This group didn't form to pray on that first day of school only or just once a week.  While that would have been a notable and worthy goal, this group aimed higher.

This student-formed, student-led group decided to meet daily, each morning before the start of school, to offer up petitions for their school and classmates.

And what began as a handful, grew and expanded until forty, then fifty, then sixty-plus people were in attendance.  Soon they will be designating one morning each week to have a student-ran Fellowship of Christian Athlete's meeting.  

I have stood back from afar and watched all of this unfold, my heart overflowing with Mustang pride, not so much for all that is happening on the outside (although that is all very good!), but for all I see occurring on the inside.  

For what transacts on the inside can't help to overflow and affect the outside.

So, this morning my heart swelled two sizes too big when Eric brought home the pictures from 'See You at the Pole':

And my mama heart filled with joy to see so many cross country runners in this crowd, including the one leading worship.

It excites me to see a group of committed prayer warriors rising up and leading their school.  It excites me that God's Spirit is moving in this place.  Praying he continues to multiply His workings on this campus, raising up strong, committed ones for His cause.

The LORD is near to all who call upon Him, To all who call upon Him in truth.   Psalm 145:18

And call upon Me in the day of trouble; I shall rescue you, and you will honor Me.  Psalm 50:15

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Psalm 4:6-7

Rejoice always; pray without ceasing. in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.  1 Thess. 5:16-18

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.  2 Chron. 7:14

We are going to Uganda!

A couple of months ago we talked at dinner one night about how 2014 was going to be the year that Eric, Joshua, Sophie and I went on a mission trip.  At the time, our thoughts were that we would try to pick one of the Starfish Orphan summer mission trips to El Salvador (Starfish Orphan Ministry is a ministry here in Paducah that does mission work both locally and overseas).  We knew it would be hard to swing all four of us going on the same trip (childcare for our other kiddos), so we thought about dividing up two and two.  

Not long after we had this discussion, our youth pastor announced he was putting together a mission trip to Uganda over 2014 Spring Break.  This mission trip will be going to do mission work with the organization SOS (Sufficiency of Scripture) Ministries (www.sosministries.com).

My heart soared when I heard Africa, specifically Uganda (or Ethiopia or Kenya, for that matter).  Having the opportunity to go and work in one of these three countries gets me stirred up.  When we homeschooled, we spent a large amount of time reading, learning and praying for these particular countries.  Our first child we sponsored through Worldvision lives in Uganda.  We have many friends who have adopted from Ethiopia.  Katie (of 'Kisses from Katie') is in Uganda.  We have watched and read much on 'The Lost Boys' who came from the UN camp in Kenya.  Bottomline:  this area of the world has captured our hearts over the years.

So we began praying about going to Uganda.

The biggest obstacle to hurdle was fear.  Not fear of going.  But the fear of the cost.  I was feeling a little guilty about not getting a small part-time job (like working 6-10 hours a week) to help pay for the constant expenses that pop up DAILY in regards to our children.  The cost of athletics they're involved with, the cost of shoes, the cost of outgrowing their clothes, the cost of when they ask if they can go get ice cream with their sport's teams, even.  Not to mention, braces???!!! (oh, that word just about sends me over the edge in panic, kind of like the word 'college' (ok, we're not even there yet, so breathe in, breathe out!)  Pondering over all of these things can make me sick to my stomach.

So, I felt guilty about getting a part-time job to save for a mission trip rather than helping with all of these other costs.  Yet, at the same time:

• There are ALWAYS going to be these kinds of expenses, ALWAYS.  Should they really keep us from going?
• If we were meant to go, God would provide a way to go.  Period.
• Sacrifice is part of the cost.  If we are about kingdom work, then we have to be willing to sacrifice in other areas.

In the three week period that we prayed about this trip, three very significant things happen.  First of all, Eric got a small raise...for about the amount of money that would subsidize our income if I got a part-time job.  It seemed as if God was saying 'I got you covered in this area.'  Second, Eric was approached about taking over a small ministry.  With it would come a small amount of compensation for doing so.  Third, a local artist (named Kijsa) who goes to our church and is in our Sunday school class had mentioned she was looking for help.  During these weeks of praying, Kijsa's name kept coming to my mind.  I couldn't shake the feeling that I needed to call her and see if she still needed help.

Finally, I called her.  Kijsa's immediate response was 'Yes, yes, yes!'  I went to meet with her in her studio.  Everything about our time together was incredible.  First of all, every bit of what she does is God honoring.  Many of the items she creates have Scripture painted on them or are Scripture ready (i.e. chalkboards with 'Verse of the Week' painted across the top).  Secondly, she told me that often when people call in to make an order, they tell her their story.  Sometimes it's a 'rejoicing' story; sometimes it's a heavy-hearted story.  Either way, much of her ministry is about praying for these people as she paints, custom-making the item to that particular person's situation.  She concluded our meeting by saying that God had taken her art and turned it into a ministry--that I could work for her ministry and then she could pay me so I could go and do ministry.  A win/win!  God's creative law of multiplication.  

A little fun side-note Kijsa is that she is one of my mother-in-law's favorite artists.  In fact, she told me all about Kijsa and drove me by her studio when we first moved to Paducah.  Little did I know that one day I would not only meet her, but go to her same church, be in her Sunday school class and then eventually work for her! 

Kijsa is incredibly talented and I encourage you to check out her website: http://kijsa.com .  Or just go directly to Etsy:  http://www.etsy.com/shop/kijsa  .

Our decision?  Sophie, Joshua and I are going to Uganda!  Since Eric has more of an inkling to go to South America, he hopes to  go on one of the Starfish mission trips this summer.  Maybe take one of our children with him?  We shall see...  No, we shall pray!

We had our first planning meeting on Wednesday night, discussing lots of ideas for fundraising--a 5K run, lunches after church on Sundays for our congregation, some parent's night outs, to name a few.  Our goal is that each person's cost after all of our fundraising will be $1,000.  This is the cost I will be working to offset through my job (times three).  

Please be praying that God will continue to show up and multiply our efforts over the next several months, providing in ways we could have never imagined!

A Special 'Birth'day

Just as I do every morning, I got up last Thursday and shuffled into the kitchen all blurry-eyed, making a bee-line for the morning joe.  The only thing that made this day different from any other day was that it happened to be my birthday.  Thus, I immediately perked up when I found an unexpected gift from Eric sitting in front of the coffee pot:

You might be thinking, 'It's a coffee cup.  What's so special about that?'  Or even, 'how boring and ordinary for a birthday present.'

Yet God's handiwork is found in creating something extraordinary out of the boring and ordinary.

Yes, to the average person, this was one ordinary cup.  But to me, it represented so much more.

You see, Nashville will forever be one special place to me because it's my city of re-birth.  The place where God reached down and made my blind eyes see.  While it may be known as Music City for the country fan, I know it as such for a much different reason.  One January cold day in 1997, a twenty-seven year old sinner finally gave up her stubborn will.  The angelic host promptly busted out with the Hallelujah chorus.  

And I've been singing ever since.

Thus, never ever does it grow old to round the bend on the interstate and see the Music City sky-line come in view.  Every single time, my breath catches while I marvel at the beauty of its holiness, the beauty of a Holy God showering down grace to the undeserving.  And a little private worship service in the car almost always ensues.  

Until I go to my grave, Nashvegas will forever represent holy ground for the grateful soul. 

Thus, this ordinary coffee cup is a reminder, a memorial stone.  A reminder of the day of my 're-birth'.  Beautifully given by my husband on my 'birth'day.  Beautifully chosen by God himself, singing 'Happy 'Birth'day to you' to my inmost parts.

So you can imagine the feel-good fuzzy feeling I had all morning long on my birthday while I sipped my favorite drink from my new favorite cup.  I was filled to the rim with the knowledge that I am God's Child and I am loved deeply.  A glorious start to a wonderful day.  

What's more, I have the hope of future meetings.  Many more mornings of sipping my drink as I spend the dawn of new days with my Creator God.  Drinking from my memorial cup while simultaneously drinking from His Well of Words.  A gift that will--indeed--keep on giving over and over and over.  

I love how God can take something small, something ordinary, and creatively use it to make Himself known to us.  Reminding us that we are special and not forgotten. 

God is so good like that.  

My husband is so good like that.

The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.  Jeremiah 31:3

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!  1 John 3:1a

We Are Home

I remember it well, our first time we attended First Baptist Church Paducah.  Two weeks fresh into a new town, a new school, and a new home.  Boxes still stacked to the ceiling in our rental home.  Physically, mentally and emotionally spinning and soaring on life's merry-go-round.  

Yet walking into the sanctuary, I was overcome by the beauty of that place.  The beauty of His holiness.  The warm color of the tall walls and arched ceilings, along with the 'stained-glass of old' beckoned me forth.  Sitting in the wooden pew that day, I found rest.  God enveloped my spirit, soothing and consoling the deep recesses of my soul.  I will never forget the worship,  sunshine spilling through the stained glass and shining down on the pews, like God's hands reaching into that place saying, 'I am here, child.'  I will never forget how God ministered to me in that very moment, in all His kindness letting me know that He was with us in our rocky, tipsy-topsy upside-down chaos.

I will never forget the people.  Their genuine love for us even though they didn't really even know us.  Their welcoming smiles and hugs.  Their ability to make us feel as if we belonged.  Their help in directing us and our children to the right Sunday School class.  

I will never forget standing and talking with others afterwards for what seemed like hours while our youngers ran around and played with the other kids and our olders hung out with the teenagers.  They all seemed so happy, so at home.  It was as if we had been there all along.  

There was such a sweet, genuine Spirit residing in that place, pouring forth from the people.  His Spirit.

In the months that followed we did the church circuit, visiting almost every church in the city.  Yet, every so often we would take a break from the search and circle back around to that church on Broadway.  Each time I walked back into that place, I would feel the comfort one feel's when returning to his bed after a long trip.  As my head hit the soft, warm pillow, I knew.  

We were home.

And while Eric and I may have felt confirmation, there were five little extensions of us whose opinions mattered too.  This would be the church that would shape them and mold them in the most important years.  We didn't want to make a rash decision.  We needed to move slow and make sure.  

We needed to pray it through.  

So we kept circling, kept visiting, kept praying.  And we kept voting.  Many Sunday dinners involved Eric pulling out a napkin and writing down each of our names and each of our top three churches.  We would not settle until everyone's top choice was unanimous.   

And finally one Spring day everyone's top choice was the other's top choice.  After months of Upward basketball, Wednesday night Awana and youth group, prayer-times with precious ladies,  sitting under a husband/wife team that made the Bible come alive, children who could not wait to go to church on Sundays and Wednesdays, our family had settled.  We had settled.

Finally, we were headed home.

But when you are a family of seven--well, you don't do anything particularly fast.  And about such things, we tend to procrastinate.  So finally, yesterday, we did it.  We walked the aisle to an official membership.

Sometimes, God will show up in the smallest of details, surprising in the sweetest of ways.  Oh, how He did so yesterday, using our procrastination to set the stage for His perfect timing.

One of the first songs our worship team led us in was 'Not To Us' (but to your name be the glory...).  Now, not once have we ever heard this song played at First Baptist.  Not one time.  Until yesterday.  The day we happened to be making our membership official.  What's such a big deal about that song, you ask?  Many years ago, we declared this as our Family Song.  It's OUR song.  It means something dear to us.  Only God knew that.  Only God could orchestrate something so personal, so sweet, so special.

One of my dearest friends happened to be singing with the worship team yesterday.  She is not always up there.  Having her leading on the day that we walked the aisle was another God-surprise, ordered up by God himself.  A God gift.

The passage preached through was Acts 4.  The sermon's message was about God sending out his untrained and uneducated men.  Yet God used them because they went forth in obedience anyway.  He used them because they relied on His power, not anything of their own.  

For me, personally, the book of Acts has been 'the book' that God has led me to over and over this past year.  It was the book we studied in CBS.  It was the book our Vacation Bible School studied this summer.  God has used this book over and over and over to remind me why He brought us to Paducah.  Us--the untrained and uneducated, yet He--the powerful, almighty God.

How like him to circle us back around to this book, to this particular chapter on this particular Sunday.  Showing us He is walking ahead of us, guiding us in His plan and in His purpose.

 Another God gift.

And then.  On the song of invitation, the song that we would walk forward to and commit, they played the song that gets me every time--Amazing Grace.

'Amazing grace how sweet the sound

 that saved a wretch like me. 

 I once was lost, but now I'm found.  

Was blind but now I see.

Twas grace that taught my heart to fear, 

And grace my fears relieved,

How precious did that grace appear 

The hour I first believed.'

I hate to kill the mood right about now, but well, this is when things got kind of weird.  This is fitting because I often have two left feet at the most inopportune times.  First, Eric stood singing forever--so long I wondered if he was going to miss the invitation.  He had his eyes closed and there were like three kids in between us so I could not get his attention.  Jason, our youth minister kept looking at me like, 'well, are you guys coming down or not?'  I looked back like, 'Ummm, I'm not sure???'  

Finally, Eric opened his eyes and gave me the nod.  Except I thought our whole family was walking down, not just he and I.  Yet, none of our kids between us were budging.  They were just standing there.  Maybe they didn't realize we were walking forward?  This didn't surprise me, this was just par for the course, as things are often miscommunicated when you live in a home of seven.  Anyway, we kept having this conversation without words, just eyes, while everyone around us sang Amazing Grace.  Finally I realized Eric just wanted me to get out of the pew without our non-budging kids, so I stepped all over their feet, almost tripping.  When we finally walked forward, my first Spirit-filled words to our youth pastor were, 'that was so awkward!' 

Ah, such a moment.  

Thankfully, pastors are good at smoothing over the uncouth.  He motioned for our children to join us and we all stood on the front pew, the stumbling-awkwardness soon forgotten.  After the offering and announcements, the pastor introduced us to the congregation.

When the service was over, people stood in line to shake our hand and introduce themselves.  To welcome us and let us know they were so happy we were there.  

Kind of like a wedding.  Walking the aisle.  Being greeted in a receiving line.  It was a great feeling. 

And finally, almost one year from the day that we moved, coming full-circle,

WE ARE OFFICIAL.  

OFFICIALLY HOME.